…the mystery no man can solve

Though her body was frail, she had a resilient mind. Though she became a widow at a very young age, she kept a smile on her face. Though she was sick and heavily burdened she continued to trust in God. One glance at her and you would have never guessed how much pain she carried yet she carried it all gracefully.

I sometimes wonder how God does it, how is it possible for the one who kissed you into this world be the one to wave you goodbye. How does it happen that the woman who carried you in her arms when you were a baby bubbly and energetic, is the same one to carry you when you are lifeless. How is it possible that the parents who looked at you hopeful for your future whispering blessings upon blessings upon your life, be the same ones who are looking down at you praying for healing as they can clearly see your soul leaving body yet they remain hopeful that anything can turn around.

They wish for your soul to return, they question why you had to leave them first but mostly they question life  the vanity of it,  they were working day and night to leave an inheritance for you… how is all this even possible?

I don’t have the answer but I know for a fact….it sucks and it is painfull.

I look back at her life and think of all the times I had a chance to speak with her. She always had a smile on her face, she was funny and fun to be around.  I remember when I last saw her, she was dancing the new year in and she was telling me about how much her daughter had grown and I could tell just how proud of her she was. Her daughter, so young so fragile has been left an orphan, I mean how exactly does this happen? I hate death with a passion, but mostly I fear the pain it leaves, I fear the fact that some people never do recover and some people become their own worst enemies. It sucks, it hurts and it sure as hell is devastating.

For those who recover good for you, help others, for those who are still on the path to healing and recovery one second at a time, eventually you will get there.